And when he was old, they put him out to pasture. They gave him a dacha
that overlooked the lake and assigned him a flat faced nurse who'd once
worked for the KGB. During the short alpine summer, when the pollution
reports were favourable, she would wheel him out onto the veranda to sit
in the sun. They kept a bracelet on his wrist, a battery of miniature sensors
that monitored his heart, blood sugar and adrenaline levels. The stainless
steel buckle deliberately too complex for his arthritic fingers to unfasten.
Every other second it broadcast a burst of medical data, relayed through
the TV in the lounge and onto thr mainframe under the school. A constant
mechanical deathwatch. His final decline bitmapprd in glorious 3D under
the ground.
His nights were filled with nightmares, as if the sum of all his fears
had finally broken thcough the decaying walls of his conscious mind. He
would wake screaming, his body rigid with terror, clawing at the smothering
blankets. Even so, as his memories faded he found himself embracing his
night terror - as the only surety of his existence.
There was a horse in the field below the dacha, a magnificent white
stallion, eighteen-hands high, with hooves as big as dinner plates, which
had gone bad tempered with old age. Once in a while a tall man with blonde
hair would enter the field and talk to the horse.
He was aware that he too had visitors, men and women, mostly in uniform.
They too would speak to him but, like the horse, he was aware only of the
tone, not the substance, of their words. He felt himself in competition
with the stallion, a contest to see who could die first.
It was dicult to say when he first became aware of the boy. He seemed
to have sprung up like a mushroom on the veranda one day, while he was
dozing. The boy never seemed to wear his boots, although the rest of his
uniform was always crisp, the blue UN flashes startling against the deep
camoufiage green. The old man would open his eyes to find the boy squatting
comfortably beside the wheelchair. He got the sense that the boy was somehow
watching over him.
New dreams overcame him in his sleep. A forest, in some far country
where the air was hot and moist under the spreading canopy. Someone would
speak to him in his dream, sometimes it was a woman, sometimes it was the
boy, sometimes a mixture of both. The dreams filled him with a sense of
loss like a fading summer.
Atter a while, a week, a month, a year - he didn't know - he spoke to
the boy.
"Who are you?" he asked.
The boy looked at him with strangely familiar eyes. Girls eyes, thought
the old man. "Don't you know me, baba?" he asked.
The old man shook his head, he'd forgotten so much. "I'm dying," he
said suddenly.
"Yes baba," said the boy, "I know."
"Everybody dies," said the old man, "me, the horse, even you."
"Yes baba."
"Do you know why we die?"
"No baba," said the boy.
"Because we live."
The boy was silent. Out on the pasture the stallion restlessly pawed
the ground.
"You like the horse?" asked the boy, finally.
"It's a stallion," said the old man as if it was important.
"You want to ride it?"
"I can't," said the old man, restless in his wheelchair.
"I think you want to," said the boy.
Mounting was easier than he thought it would be; the boy was stronger
than he looked, boosting him onto the horse's back. He felt the hot skin
of the horse against his legs as he got astride, the muscles shifting under
the skin.
"I say," he told the boy, "I think I've forgotten how to do this."
"Nothing is forgotten " said the boy.
"Don't tell me, he snapped, "tell the horse."
The boy smiled and raised his hand. In that moment the old man saw himself
reflected in the boy's expression.
Suddenly he remembered it all. He remembered the path in the forest
the girl with the basket on her head being young and full of impetuous
blood.
"Wait," said the old man. There were questions he wanted to ask, things
he wanted to say.
The flat of the boy's hand came down hard on the stallion's rump.
The old man forgot the boy as the horse sprang away. He was amazed at
the power still in the old animal. Amazed at the strength in his own limbs,
as he gripped with his knees and held onto the mane with both hands. The
horse raced across the pasture, its hooves thundering on the grass like
the sound of distant guns.
The perimeter of the field was marked with a barhed wire fence but the
stallion took it easily, snorting with contempt. They hit the medacam surface
of the access road that ran down to the main road.
He felt the wind rip around his face stripping away the haze that had
consumed his mind. He changed his posture riding with his back down, head
thrust forward into the wind. The stallion responded hy picking up the
gallup.
He saw the school to his left, framed by the blue white peaks of the
mountain beyond. People were outside, men and women with startled faces
running to intercept him. He wanted to shout to them, to tell them that
it was all right, that he'd discovered the secret of eternal youth but
his lungs were full of cold air and pain. The horse, too, was breathing
in ragged uneven gasps, spittle flying back from drawn lips.
Across the landing field they raced. Where the helicopters clattered
and buzzed. Across the perimeter road and onto the final pasture before
the lake. He risked a look behind. A land cruiser was chasing them, bouncing
across the rutted field. The driver taking insane risks to reach them in
time.
Too late. Ahead the edge of the cliff bisected his view, the far shore
of the lake just visible above and beyond that, the cool peaks of the mountains.
A line of wire mesh across the lip to stop the unwary falling.
One last fence.
The hated bracelet on his wrist started to scream. A last technical
defence against oblivion.
The stallion took the fence with a metre to spare.
The ground vanished from beneath them.
He felt the artery burst like a blow inside his skull.
Horse and rider were both dead before they hit the water two hundred
metres below.
And when he was dead they put him in the ground. They gave him a funeral
with full military honours and buried him under the Union Jack. After the
young soldiers had been paraded away, the old soldiers went inside to tell
their lies and to try drink enough to sleep that night.
It was almost dawn by the time General Bambera climbed into bed and
her husband's arms. He'd taken it very well considering it had been his
horse.
"Nothing is forgotten," she said before she fell asleep.
They woke her an hour later, to tell her that a mountain in America
had just exploded.
Source: Doctor Who Magazine #195
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